Planning for Revisions

For my portfolio, the type of essay I decided to revise is arguing a position. My strengths in the arguing of a position essay were when giving convincing evidence and had a good thesis. My weaknesses were, talking about a personal experience and not following my thesis completely in every paragraph in the essay.

For my essay to be effectively revised, I will need to change the story I had talked about. Talking about a personal experience seemed like I was trying to manipulate the audience instead of informing them. By including this personal experience the position I am taking will just fail. I should instead talk about something that looks more convincing and relates to my thesis.

I will also make sure that every forthcoming paragraph will go completely with my thesis. In my paragraphs I only included part of the thesis. When I wrote my paragraphs I only concentrated in following only certain part of the thesis. I did not know that every paragraph had to relate with my thesis. Not relating my paragraphs with my thesis completely made my essay incomplete. Once I am done revising the essay, I will now go over it a few times and make sure that each paragraph is related to my whole thesis.